Hilariously tall tales - review of Greg Davies

Greg Davies at The Corn Exchange, Newbury on Friday, June 17

I DON’T like to use the word “hilarious” in my reviews of comedy for the Newbury Weekly News - partly because not all the acts I see hit the “hilarious” button enough times to deserve it, but also because if I describe a comedian’s performance as hilarious, where do I go from there? What if I see someone even more consistently, side-achingly, tear-inducingly funny the following week? What word do I use to describe them?

But I have decided on this occasion to take the plunge. So, here goes... Greg Davies is hilarious. His show, Firing Cheeseballs At A Dog, elicited laughs, guffaws, chuckles and titters from beginning to end. His support act, Ed Gamble, was pretty good as well, which isn’t always a given. Davies apologised if some of his material was familiar to the audience who may have seen his recent appearance on TV channel Dave, “but I have extended the show since then”.

In fact, he had brought it in a shortened embryonic form to Newbury in April 2010 as part of The Big Laugh comedy event put on by The Corn Exchange’s youth committee (he’s also previously performed at Newbury Comedy Festival as part of the sketch trio We Are Klang). No matter; it was excellent then, but an Edinburgh Fringe run and an inordinate number of tour dates later, Davies has lovingly honed the show into a well-crafted run through some of the most bizarre “true’ moments from his life, introducing some fabulously freakish characters along the way, including his magnificently eccentric parents.

Whizzing through some more ignominious periods of his life - his university years were summed up as “Drunk. Pathetic. Single” - in favour of the long, dark teatime of the soul which was his teaching career, Davies was wonderfully self-deprecating (describing his toddler self as resembling Mr Tickle) without ever slipping into maudlin introspection. He teetered in his tales and their telling just on the right side of “man of the people” rather than wobbling over into “worryingly strange”. He happily jumped into the audience to find a “young person”, and bravely let it slip that he was off to The Dolphin pub after the show to see a mate’s band. I bet they suddenly had an influx of new customers in there around 11pm on Friday.

The next comedian I see has a lot to live up to [it might be Mark Thomas during Newbury Comedy Festival in July, so to be fair, he’s likely to do a pretty good job ]. For now, I will pack the word “hilarious” away, having reserved it for Davies alone. I hope he uses it wisely and liberally.

• First published in Newbury Weekly News on Thursday, June 23, 2011

In a room... with Dodgy - review

Dodgy at South Street Arts Centre, Reading, on Saturday, June 4

AUGUST 1996. Reading Festival. I'm working on the Saturday, but "no worries," says Bill, "come down later, we'll probably be at the main stage, somewhere on the left - don't be late for Dodgy!". Hmm. Vague. Anyway, early evening I make it onto the festival site; Dodgy are already on. I wind my way through the crowd towards the front of the main stage, keeping towards the left - and just as Dodgy start playing my favourite song, Grassman, I spot Bill's leather jacket. Sorted.

OK, so Reading Festival back then wasn't the immense crush of more recent years, and I do have a theory that we all used to have built-in satnav which was switched off when we all got mobile phones, but I like to believe that it was the magic of Dodgy that made a seemingly impossible meet-up very straightforward indeed.

June 2011. South Street Arts Centre, Reading. I'm not going to have much trouble finding Bill at this gig, as the room only holds a couple of hundred people (but there he is, down the front, on the left). Appearing as a favour for an old muso friend, the organiser of Reading's Know Your History club night (which aims to mark major musical anniversaries), Dodgy have not only agreed to play for a cut-price rate,  but are obliged to perform a track off The Smiths' album The Queen Is Dead, which was released 25 years ago. Their attempt at There Is A Light That Never Goes Out is not exactly the musical accomplishment of the night, but it would amuse all but the most hardcore Smiths fans. Luckily there don't seem to be many of those in tonight.

Dodgy have been back in the shape of their classic line-up (Nigel Clark, lead singer and bassist, Andy Miller, guitarist, and Matthew Priest, drummer) since 2007, but this was the first time that I've seen them since the 90s - when I saw them many, many times. Older they may be, wiser they may not be, but the trio's vocals still blend together together in perfection, on old hits such as Staying Out For The Summer and the epic and uplifting So Let Me Go Far (but sadly not Grassman - I've since had words with them about that), and newer tracks from more recent and forthcoming albums.

One thing I always loved about Dodgy back in the day was their sense of fun, and it's good to see that has remained intact despite the passing years, as they banter with the crowd and each other throughout their set. As a microphone slipped down its stand, Nigel bravely battles on with the song, straddling lower and lower until he is all legs akimbo, like a dubious Elvis impersonator. I doubt Morrissey would be so obliging. Hilarious.

Dodgy, I know you've never really been away, but welcome back into my life. I hope you'll stay a while.

Fluffy Kitson - review of Daniel Kitson

Daniel Kitson: The Interminable Suicide of Gregory Church, at The Corn Exchange, Newbury, on Thursday, May 26

I KNEW Daniel Kitson was meant to be good. After all, he was voted “best British stand-up of all time” by fellow comedians in Dave’s Census of Humour earlier this year. So I kind of expected to be blown away by him - and when I was, it wasn’t a complete surprise. But that didn’t make the experience of being blown away any less exhilarating, life-enhancing or uplifting - with the left field addition of also being incredibly touching.

The show Kitson is currently touring isn’t ‘stand-up’ as such. It’s actually what he describes as a “story show”, delving into the life of the character Gregory Church, from his decision to end his life after redundancy in the early ‘80s until his eventual death more than 20 years later. The tale was told through Kitson’s discovery of 30,000 letters sent and received by the retired and isolated Church, cataloguing the unsolicited salvation found in the replies to his 50-odd suicide notes (“he never expected anyone to write back”) and his slow return to life through the ongoing correspondence which continued through the years.

Starting the tale with “this bit is true” meant that although the audience was fully aware that it was entirely a product of Kitson’s detailed and ordered imagination, it was unclear where the truth becomes fiction and the “story” actually started, resulting in a deeper emotional investment in Church and the recipients of his letters. There was a collective sense of sadness when his long-term sparring partner, the local newspaper editor, passed away, and a frisson of hope for romance, which came to nothing, for, as Kitson says, an account of someone’s life does not have the satisfactory resolutions of a book or a film.

Kitson’s compelling delivery was unfettered by his occasional stutter (“if it bothers you in any way... you are a bigot”), while his easy distraction made for unplanned moments, both amusing and awkward. To see him giggling at the illusionary bend in his glass of water was a delight, but microphone problems and the crinkle of a sweet packet in the audience showed that for Kitson, the intensity of performance can be a challenge. However, each situation was overcome with politeness and charm, and we were quickly delved back into the absorbing tale. This was a show that revealed much about the lives of two most interesting characters - Gregory Church, and his fascinating, complex and delightful creator, Daniel Kitson. 

* First published in the Newbury Weekly News on Thursday, June 2, 2011

Just what I always Wanted - review of The Wanted

The Wanted at Newbury Racecourse, on Saturday, May 21

NEWBURY Racecourse may be gearing up for music legends Rod Stewart this Sunday and Tom Jones on August 13, but last weekend the stage belonged to a group of new kids on the block whose combined age barely beats that of elder statesman Mr Jones.

Since hitting the top of the charts with their first single, All Time Low, in the week of its release last August, The Wanted have struck a chord with girls from pre-teens upwards all over the UK, from east to west. Life may never be the same for the five-piece who hail from various parts of the UK and Ireland (rather than springing up fully-formed from some backstreet, boys were auditioned for a coveted place in the band),  but The Wanted have a strong work ethic, and less than a year since their debut, have busted a gut to get their second album recorded and ready for release. 

Despite only having one album under their belt, The Wanted performed for more than an hour, debuting forthcoming single Lightening (lyrics: “in fact it’s all a little bit frightening; we might as well be playing with lightening”, and covering songs by Jason Mraz and the Goo Goo Dolls. They then took things up to another level with a demonstration that these musical youths aren’t just pretty faces but can also play instruments, with a laid back cover of Neon Trees’ Animal, before they let loose with a lively covers medley of hits by Taio Cruz. Whether his song Dirty Picture was entirely suitable for the age of The Wanted’s target audience was debatable - a bit blue, maybe?

Their dance routines may be a little more unconstructed than many boy bands, but their singing was A1 and impressively in sync with each other; much better than I, for one, was expecting, and putting many a former Popstars/Pop Idol/ X Factor act (of whom I fear I have seen more live than I care to admit) to shame. To us oldies, they might just seem like a new edition of so many outfits that we have seen come and go since the 80s (and before), but as they grow from boys to men, The Wanted may prove to have the staying power that elludes so many boy bands. As a rousing lyric-perfect crowd singalong of their single Heart Vacancy demonstrated, right now, these boys own their rightful place at the top of the pops, and demonstrate that it is possible to storm the charts without being a Simon Cowell production. Take that, JLS!

• First published in Newbury Weekly News on Thursday, May 26, 2011

There are 14 boy bands 'hidden' in the above review (not counting The Wanted) - can you spot them all?

Rouse! Rouse! - review of Rob Rouse

Rob Rouse at New Greenham Arts, Newbury on Saturday, May 14

AS eager to please as Ronnie, his over-friendly mongrel featured on film to start the show, comedian Rob Rouse bounded onto the stage full of the joys of spring to tell the tale of The Great Escape - the upping of his family’s sticks from London to the Peak District. The move proved to be a fertile source of material for Rouse, as characterful neighbours and the local wildlife welcomed his family with open arms and a lot more besides.

From a neighbour grateful that Ronnie had slaughtered his chickens because it “saved him a job” to lively pensioners Bill and Margaret, stories of village life blossomed in the telling, mulched up with the joys of family life with a potty-training toddler and long-suffering partner. Former geography teacher Rouse explained that as he embraced the joys of country living he took on the challenge of living off the land, in particular taking his obsession with roadkill to extremities beyond the comfort zone of his vegetarian girlfriend. 

As warm and comforting as nettle soup and packed full of gently exaggerated anecdotes and insights into the skill of “contact technique parking” (“you don’t need parking sensors, that’s what the bumpers are for”), the two hour-plus show flew by with no obvious padding from its original 60 minute Edinburgh Fringe format. I particularly loved the Polish-“speaking” dog, patiently retrained to understand English commands (“teaching its new owners four or five key Polish words didn’t seem to have been considered”) and a wedding reception where Rouse discovered that the villagers knew how to enjoy themselves with an iPhone.

The show built up to an extended denouement involving the rotting corpse of a roadkilled sheep in Rouse’s car boot, during which the suspensions of reality were stretched to snapping point. The believability may not have held throughout, but overall, Rouse’s performance was a breath of fresh country air.

• First published in Newbury Weekly News on Thursday, May 19, 2011

Getting down with Da Vinci - review

Review by Bill Ainsworth 


Da Vinci at Ace Space, Newbury, on Friday, April 15.

A mixed bag of musicians comprising veteran songwriter and keyboardist Jim Johhnson, who has worked with such luminaries as Brian Eno Cozy Powell and Peter Green,; bassist  Francois Pirois, a “crazy Frenchman”; youthful guitarist Ollie Trethewey, a music student; drummer Steve Cruikshank, who I saw many years ago in legendary local dub radicals Military Surplus & RDF; and saxophonist and clarinettist Alan Whetton, who has been in Dexys Midnight Runners amongst others; plus vocalist, where required, Lydia Johnson (Jim’s daughter) make up Hungerford based outfit Da Vinci.

After what had been an emotional day for those members who had attended the funeral of fellow Military Surplus/RDF member Steve Swann (R.I.P.) the band entertained a crowd as varied in age as the band at Newbury’s wonderfully intimate, yet amply sized Ace Space.

The band’s style would be equally suited to a swish cocktail bar or an ocean liner’s lounge, they opened with a pair of diverse cover versions, Cole Porter’s Summertime and Portishead’s Glory Box, which suited 20-someting Lydia’s lush, rich vocal talents beautifully. This was followed by a series of Jim’s mellow songs and instrumentals, with Alan’s instruments very much in the leading role. These included Visions, which reminded me of a late70’s/early 80’s U.S. TV theme, but I couldn’t put my finger on exactly which one; a jazzy Miles & Miles (Geddit?); It’s Only Love; Funk Off; a gorgeous song called Stay With Me;  and Love For Lydia, during which the lady for whom the tune was written stayed in the wings, smiling and dare I say blushing, which was understandable.

After the interval Steve said a few words in tribute to Mr Swann before they launched into Bob Marley’s I Shot The Sheriff, which was the cue for the first few people to leave their drinks on their subtly candlelit tables and hit the dancefloor. Van The Man’s Moondance followed and then, my favourite band composition of the night, Passion. The second set was more up tempo than the first and styles ranging from Dave Brubeck to The Police came to mind. The band said their farewells with a second airing of Passion, even groovier than the first, at which point I was reminded of the suave and sadly short lived heyday of Swing Out Sister.

A very chilled and enjoyable evening was had by all.

• By guest blogger Bill Ainsworth, first published in Newbury Weekly News on Thursday, April 21, 2011

Bridging the gap - review of Paul Chowdhry

Blogger: The Smudge - Edit Post "Bridging the gap"

Paul Chowdhry at New Greenham Arts, Newbury on Wednesday, April 27

BRITISH-Indian comedian Paul Chowdhry got a surprise when he walked on stage at New Greenham Arts, commenting “this is the whitest audience I’ve ever had” - although the dedication of his Asian fans was demonstrated by some having travelled from as far as Southampton for the initial date of his first national tour.

Already well-known among the Asian community, Chowdhry has a number of catchphrases that his fans clearly loved, but meant that it took a while for those unfamiliar with his work to get fully up to speed with his hard-hitting style.

However, once proceedings were fully warmed up, Chowdhry proved to be a most interesting and entertaining comedian, with a show that touched on issues of racism, ignorance, generation gaps and miscommunication, demonstrating that it is possible for people from every culture to laugh at themselves and each other if there is mutual respect and appreciation.

Apart from some misjudged off-the-cuff jokes aimed at a couple in the audience about the man giving his partner a “slap” - taken good-naturedly by the targets, but touching on a theme which I don’t think should ever play a part in a comedy show - Chowdhry balanced his rehearsed material well with audience interaction. He also demonstrated a talent for mimicry and threw out some cracking one-liners - “The Royal Wedding will have 1,900 guests attending. That’s just one side of the family at an Indian wedding”.

An unintentionally funny moment arose when Chowdhry accidentally referred to the “Newbury Gazette”, resulting in several heckles of “Nooo, it’s the Newbury Weekly News” from different parts of the room. “Now I know what really upsets you,” commented Chowdhry. That’s right - it’s not jokes about the BNP membership helpline being run from India that rises the hackles of a Newbury audience - it’s not getting the name of the local newspaper correct. I think he felt suitably chastened.

Chowdhry’s Not PC national tour may herald the start of him hitting the mainstream, but I get the feeling that he won’t be prepared to compromise his act for the comfort of a wider audience.  Don’t expect to see him chatting on Alan Titmarsh’s sofa any time soon, but certainly try to catch him live if you get the chance.

* Paul Chowdhry will be at the Wyvern Theatre in Swindon on June 8 and The Forge at The Anvil in Basingstoke on June 23.

• First published in Newbury Weekly News on Thursday, May 5 2011

Taking a trip back to Ibiza - interview with Isomeric

Isomeric: Griff Johnson and Si Cook

JUST a couple of miles outside Newbury, the village of Enborne is a tranquil part of West Berkshire, but possibly a surprising source of creation for a new “chill” album - featuring a type of music more usually inspired by exotic climes and warmer temperatures.

But it is here that Simon Cook - pharmaceutical scientist by day, mad scientist of the mixing desk by night - has his home studio, and along with former Newbury resident Griff Johnson, works his musical magic to create the mellow sounds associated with chill music under their new moniker Isomeric.

Formerly known as Tripswitchers (they changed their name because it was too similar to some other musical outfits), Cook and Johnson, who grew up in Newbury (he now lives in Guildford), met through a friend who knew Cook was looking for new collaborators. Originally Johnson, a prolific West End musical director, was hired as a session keyboardist, but the pair soon bonded over a mutual dream of reviving the vibe of party islands such as Ibiza in their heyday, where downtempo chill music helped revellers recover from frenetic and prolonged sessions on the dancefloors of the superclubs. “I think there was a feeling very early on that we weren’t going to be a gigging rock & roll band,” says Cook.

Inspired by their travels around the world - Cook says that quite a few of the tracks were penned in their earliest form while he was on holiday - the pair found writing together a natural and easy process. For the recording, they gathered live musicians and vocalists from a variety of sources -  singers on their debut album include West End star Kerry Ellis and former Freakpower singer Ashley Slater; they have also worked with Newbury’s own Fiona Bennett, and are currently working “more and more” with a singer called Katie Holmes, whose “silky jazzy voice goes well with the beats.

“The 11 tracks aren’t just variations of each other, they cover a range of styles, and sometimes the tempos aren’t always ‘chilled’ as such - but relaxation is the common theme,” says Cook. “New production techniques make it easier to fuse the electro beats of the Ibiza era with the strong soul songwriting styles of the 1970s. We don’t let technology take away the musicianship, and we believe in the importance of good lyrics.

“However, we have to be very disciplined with the BPM [beats per minute] - you can’t have something over 100bpm and still call  it downtempo.

“There’s no reason that just because we’re using electronic tools, we can’t use the methodologies of classical songwriting. That’s why we called our record label ‘Kolloidal Music’ - ‘colloidal’ means the mix of two things that shouldn’t go together, like the oil and water in mayonnaise. Our sound is simple, but there are layers of complexity, rather like what Brian Wilson did with the Beach Boys’ Pet Sounds. Sometimes the simplest things are complicated to achieve.”

Cook and Johnson have released their album, Tropic Of Comfort, on their own label, and in mp3 format only, at least to begin with, although Cook is aware that some music lovers “still like to hold a CD”. Central to such decisions has been the invaluable advice of Cook’s brother, big beat DJ Norman Cook (who formerly topped the charts with Freakpower, along with Slater).  “He told me we didn’t need to sell our soul to a big record company, and could do it all ourselves. It’s been quite a learning curve for me - designing the album cover and so on. But it’s so immediate - one song made it onto the album having been finished just two days before its release.”

While Norman has had a full-time career in music since his days as bassist with The Housemartins in the 1980s, Cook likes the idea of the ‘renaissance man’, balancing his day job with his musical passions. “We all get labelled, but there’s no reason why we can’t be into everything.”

Cook admits that his brother’s technical know-how has been useful in helping him master the sound engineering techniques required to produce his own music, although the siblings certainly differ on musical styles: “Norman’s about the party; we’re more about the morning after,” jokes Cook. “Isomeric is about creating a vibe of dreaminess; a languid and lazy fluid sound; something blissful and sublime. We have a passion for music, and we hope that shows.”

* Tropic Of Comfort by Isomeric is available to download, as an album or by individual tracks, from iTunes, Amazon and eMusic.

What a nice Imran - review of Imran Yusuf

Imran Yusuf at Arlington Arts Centre, Snelsmore, on Saturday, April 2

COMEDIAN Imran Yusuf was in buoyant mood as he bounded on stage at Arlington Arts on Saturday - kissing a shaven-headed male audience member and shaking local PR man Nigel Morgan by the hand - and with good reason, as it was Morgan’s support of Yusuf when he judged the first-ever Newbury Comedy Festival You Must Be Joking contest back in 2004 that effectively launched his stand-up career.

Since then, Yusuf has been bubbling away on the comedy circuit, with his second big break coming last year, when a stint on the Free Fringe at the Edinburgh Festival led to a Edinburgh Comedy Awards Best Newcomer nomination - the first performer in a free show to receive this plaudit. The result has been national television and radio appearances and a 42-date tour of his nominated show, An Audience with Imran Yusuf.

Saturday’s performance gave Yusuf the opportunity to show his real mettle - as well as his gratitude to Newbury - by making up for a no-show by his support act who had succumbed to food poisoning, with a preview of material prepared for hi 2011 Edinburgh show. Similarly to his main show, much of this explored the idea of identity. A practising Muslim, taken aback by how often he is asked what his parents think of his comedy (“my mother doesn’t know because my father doesn’t let her watch television”), Yusuf has a rich cultural heritage, having been born in Kenya to Kokani (Indian) Muslim parents and raised in London, with a year’s schooling in the USA while staying with relatives.

This year in the USA was an interesting experience for Yusuf, as it was the first time he’d experienced prejudice for being British, and contrasted well with his story of a pilgrimage to Jerusalem, where he single-handedly “brought peace to the Middle East”    as a Palestinian and an Israeli soldier consulted together on whether he was authentically Muslim enough to be allowed into the sacred Islamic Dome of the Rock outside of tourist visiting hours.

Suited and booted, Yusuf had a quirky style and turn of phrase, mixing self-deprecation at the expense of his skinny frame with some intentionally highly dubious chat-up lines, London-style gangsta-speak and a few amusingly outrageous statements that led the audience to gasp collectively, with the pay-off “I can get away with this!”.

Having seen him perform for radio at a recording of BBC Radio 4’s current affairs comedy series The Now Show in December, and now live at Arlington Arts, it is clear that Yusuf is a confident performer with plenty to say, and is fearless of delving into his own psyche to explore some interesting and challenging issues. Ebullient all the way through the show, he still had enough energy at the end for a sit-down chat with some of the audience in the lobby. It was nice to see a performer who was so prepared to give.

• First published in Newbury Weekly News on April 7, 2011
• Images courtesy of Nigel Morgan from Morgan PR, a leading Berkshire public relations and social media consultancy http://www.morganpr.co.uk/

After 90 minutes on stage, Imran Yusuf chatted with some of the audience members for more than an hour after the show, answering questions and telling stories. As Nigel Morgan says: "This was the real Audience with Imran Yusuf!"

Big titters - review of Frankie Titters On!

Frankie Titters On! at Arlington Arts, Snelsmore, on Saturday, March 26

HAVING found his place as a cult comedian much-loved by students in the final years before his death in 1992, Frankie Howerd’s 45-year career was described by fellow comedian Barry Cryer as “a series of comebacks”. So not surprisingly, his story, full of showbiz highs and lows, chronic stage fright and hypochondria, makes rich material for this one-man stage show in which Paul Harris brings Howerd back from the afterlife for a look back on his life and career.

From Howerd’s early struggles to become an actor, through his early success and into long periods of ‘resting’ and depression, through which his manager and life partner Dennis Heymer remained a steadfast source of support and love, Howerd came across as a high-maintenance but still likeable character whose self-belief was as delicately balanced as his toupee.

Howerd believed that his periods of critical and popular ignominy were a natural payoff for the salad days of success - for example when the follow-up to his hit television series Up Pompeii! was a flop. Anyone remember Whoops Bagdad!? However, he often brought disaster upon his own career by succumbing to imagined or exaggerated illnesses at crucial moments, or bad decisions made in deference to his wish to be taken seriously as an actor.

Interspersed with tales of fall and redemption were stand-up performances of Howerd’s act, a reminder of how naughty his material was, and how much more open minded audiences of old must have been than we realise, to not be terribly shocked at double-entendres and language which would raise eyebrows among some audiences today. Harris revived Howerd’s turn of phrase, mannerisms and tics fabulously, with Howerd’s childhood stammer always simmering under the surface of his polished performance. 

Despite the sadness in Howerd’s life, the show never got too dark - the abuse he received at the hands of his father was only touched upon, not surprisingly as Howerd never liked talking about himself, and even when appearing on the big television chat shows, would insist on seeing the questions in advance so he could prepare thoroughly. Even his long-term relationship with Heymer remained fairly private knowledge until his death, with his on-stage material portraying him as a man with an eye for the ladies. 

The performance ended on a particularly cheeky note from Harris that raised an appropriately big titter. Ooh no missus indeed.

• First published in the Newbury Weekly News, on Thursday, March 31, 2011

The baby boom - activities for babies and toddlers (feature)

HAVING left it a whole seven years after the birth after my first darling cherub before I could face sprogging again, I have found the wealth of activities, events and temptations available to West Berkshire mums and babes in 2011 to be quite overwhelming. Of  course the old stalwarts existed way back in the dark ages of 2002 - the NCT with its frankly terrifying (but oh-so-worth-it) nearly new sales, my family’s favourite Monkey Music, and the local toddler group (still an excellent way for any new mum to make friends with other parents in her area) - but it was a fairly select choice, and much of it I missed out on entirely owing to a return to work before young George was old enough to participate in much that was on offer. Nowadays you can have your newborn baby signing, singing and performing bendy yoga positions before you’ve left the maternity ward - I’m joking, of course, but there are now a host of classes that you can start attending with your little one long before maternity leave ends.

Of course baby-centred activities in those early weeks are as much about benefiting Mum’s sense of wellbeing as well as her newborn, getting her out and about, meeting other new mothers, and giving her confidence in her parenting skills. The Breastfeeding Support Group is a free weekly drop-in session at Speenhamland Primary School, Newbury, on Thursdays from 1pm to 2.30pm, while the NCT’s monthly Bumps and Babes group, for pregnant women and those with babies up to 12 months is relaunching on May 17 at its new regular venue, Ace Space in Newbury. The first session will include a talk about cranial osteopathy, and costs 50p to attend. New parents are also well catered for by West Berkshire’s thriving network of Government-funded Sure Start centres, where for a nominal charge they can attend sessions for newborns or crawlers and walkers, or sign up for the 10 week Parents As First Teachers programme.

Once Baby is interacting a bit more, there is a host of classes to choose from, with only the cost and number of days in the week limiting the choices available. As well as Monkey Music, there’s Music With Mummy and local group Little Quavers Music, which runs its sessions in Thatcham and Cold Ash on a turn-up-and-pay basis, rather than signing up for a term at a time. Many classes are held in community halls, while others are based at dedicated play centres, such as Eddie Katz in Newbury and Thatcham’s Krazy Klub. In recent years, some established organisations aimed initially at older children have expanded their programme to included younger babies, such as Tumble Tots, which now runs Gymbabes to introduce pre-walkers from six months upwards to its active physical play programme.

Newbury children wouldn’t have access to the much-loved Tumble Tots programme at all if it wasn’t for Sharon Browne, a Tumble Tots mum who bought the franchise after it closed suddenly last summer after 26 years, leaving more than 350 children bereft. “I am so convinced of the benefits that children gain from Tumble Tots that I felt compelled to be a part of it,” explains the former nanny. “What is so appealing is the whole atmosphere. The children are happy, the parents are happy and the staff are happy. I am enjoying the satisfaction of seeing children develop in such a positive way.”

Tumble Tots may have been running since the early 1980s, but more recently other businesses have sprung up to attract the “parent pound”, such as the Baby & Children’s Market, which holds regular events at Newbury Racecourse, offering a slightly more sedate shopping alternative to the crazy (but fun, and oh-so-worth-it) NCT nearly new sales which take place several times a year. In addition, there are thriving car boot sales in Newbury and Thatcham which are a fabulous source of second hand baby equipment and clothes for parents on a budget.

For mums and dads with a bit more cash to splash, there are a host of gift ideas available that will preserve those precious early days for eternity, such as the finger and hand prints cast into solid silver jewellery by Newbury mumtrepreneur Penny Daly who set up her Smallprint franchise in 2009. “Not only is it a beautiful product, it enables me to balance my work with being mum to my two boys - there are very few jobs that offer both. I thought life would get easier as they got older, but now they are both at school they want even more of my time.” She now spends her days attending various toddler groups and events, meaning she can be at the school gates at home time, and choosing the hours she spends at home creating the handcrafted jewellery.

For a very unusual gift to be treasured, Basingstoke-based poet and comedian Jan Jack  offers Perfect Verse Toddler Tomes, a business she started 18 months ago after being asked to write a poem for a mum from the point of view of her two young sons. “During a phone chat with her husband, I asked him about the boys’ special relationship with Mum, nicknames, sibling rivalry, funny things they said. I then created a page of verse written from their viewpoint and telling Mum how much they loved her.” Since then, Jan has written many children’s bespoke poems, and says they are now her favourite type of verse. “Putting yourself in the mindset of a sometimes indignant four-year-old can be great fun. They are also guaranteed to make mummies - and sometimes daddies - cry. They really seem to touch a chord.”

Many local baby-centred franchises are run by mothers who decided they wanted a business which fitted around their homelife, such as Sarah Sunthareswaran from Water Babies, who trained as a baby swimming teacher after taking her daughter Sophia to lessons from the age of just 12 weeks and being “absolutely blown away”. “I have such amazing fond memories of watching her very first underwater swim, and it created an amazing bond between us.” When the local Water Babies franchise became available she “snapped it up”, and now has a team of 10 teachers working with nearly 1,000 babies throughout Berkshire, Oxfordshire and Buckinghamshire - giving Sarah time to have two more water babies of her own, while still running the business she loves.

Similarly, Sandra Scaplehorn of TinyTalk discovered the joys of baby signing - a form of pre-verbal communication that allow babies to communicate before they can talk -  along with her own daughter, Kara, soon after her birth in 2008, although at that time she had to look further afield than Newbury for classes. “Having attended TinyTalk classes a bit further afield, my daughter started using sign language, and after a bit of perseverance on my part, hey presto - she could tell me when she wanted milk! By the time she was 18 months we did the ultimate test - we went to a restaurant with a baby in tow. It was an eye-opening experience. She sat in her  highchair, signing ‘drink’, ‘bread’, ‘water’, ‘enough’ and ‘home’. She even signed ‘thankyou’ to the waitress!  truly believe that signing strengthens the vital parent-child bond and empowers the babies.”

Lovely as it would be to sign your baby up to all the classes on offer, most parents just pick one or two to attend every week - but which ever you choose, it is clear that there are developmental and bonding benefits, such as those offered by Monkey Music. Franchise owner Val Stephenson welcomes babies from three months old to her classes at venues throughout West Berkshire. “I always find it amazing how babies even this young are transfixed with different sounds, and ho they learn through singing, cuddling, rocking, talking and clapping, all of which stimulates the baby;s brain and encourages new developmental pathways. Very quickly babies anticipate what is going to happen next, and the excitement when Monkey appears is immense.”

Val also believes that such classes are beneficial for the parents who attend - it’s mostly mums, but dads are welcome too; Take That’s Mark Owen caused great excitement when he turned up with his child at a class in London a couple of years ago. “It’s a lovely way to make new friends and enjoy some special time with their baby. It forces them to sit down and take pleasure watching their baby respond to a huge variety of interesting sounds.” Parents are expected to join in the singing, but no one is expecting operatic standards, so most mums are happy to take a full part in the fun.

For classes that offer babies a taster of all sorts of exciting and stimulating experiences, Baby Sensory involve a wide variety of action rhymes, baby signing and massage, mixed in with with use of puppets, fibre optic lights, bubbles, balls, bells, scarves, water play and more. As well as a regular programme of classes, Newbury franchisee Jane Doyle runs occasional free sessions at Newbury Library - these are ticketed events promoted in advance at the library’s own free Rhymetime sessions, which take place at 11am on the first, third and fifth (if there is one) Tuesday of each month. “One of the best arts of my job is watching the babies’ sheer enjoyment, and over time their growth and development. the sessions encourage parents and carers to play with their babies and show them things that can be made at home at very little expense for their little ones to play with and explore. Another fantastic thing I have noticed is the confidence the babies have. They are more than willing to fetch their own equipment and get involved.”

Just starting out in the wonderful world of baby business is Judith Saunders, who has been running Tatty Bumpkin yoga classes for children for six months, and has just launched Baby Bumpkin for babies and toddlers. “The classes are a wonderful way for parents and carers to bond with their children while learning massage techniques for the younger babies, and adapted yoga moves for the older ones, all designed to encourage their natural development. The benefits of massage and yoga for babies are improved sleep and digestion as well as encouraging correct muscle development and stability required for crawling and walking. Mums get some nice stretches too, and the chance to make new friends and relearn some forgotten nursery rhymes!”

•  The Breastfeeding Support Group at Speenhamland Primary School is run as an outreach project by North Newbury Children’s Centre (Sure Start) at Victoria Park Nursery School, telephone (01635) 31143.
• Details on community baby and toddler groups, local Sure Start Centres and other activities are available from the West Berkshire Family Information Service, visit www.childrensinfo.org or freephone 0800 328 9148
• Information on Bumps and Babes and other parent and child groups run by Newbury & District NCT can be found at http://www.nct.org.uk/in-your-area/newbury/groups, and the date of its next Nearly New Sale can be found at http://www.nct.org.uk/in-your-area/newbury
• For parents thinking of starting their own baby-based franchise, the websites Mum and Working www.mumandworking.co.uk, Netmums www.netmums.com and Female Franchise www.femalefranchise.co.uk are good places to start.

Other contact details:

• Monkey Music - www.monkeymusic.co.uk, tel. (01635) 860959
• Music With Mummy - www.musicwithmummy.co.uk (run by various franchisees in Newbury, Hungerford, Kintbury, Thatcham, Tadley, Burghfield Common and Mortimer)
• Little Quavers - www.littlequaversmusic.co.uk, tel. (01635) 200112 or (01635) 863495
• Tumble Tots - www.tumbletots.com/Newbury-Salisbury/, tel. (01635) 241201
• Baby & Children’s Market - www.babyandchildrensmarket.co.uk, tel. 07881641614
• Smallprint - www.smallp.co.uk, tel. (01635) 35262
• Perfect Verse Toddler Tomes - http://perfectverse.vpweb.co.uk/For-my-Mummy.html, tel. 07917 127381
• Water Babies - www.waterbabies.co.uk/local/oxford, tel. (01869) 325499
• Tiny Talk - www.tinytalk.co.uk/sandras/, tel. 07525476486
• Baby Sensory - www.babysensory.com, tel. 07738969358
• Tatty Bumpkin - www.newburyandover.tattybumpkin.com, tel. 0845 680 8461 or 07780996064

First published in Out & About magazine, March/April 2011

A right rocking knees-up - review of Chas & Dave

Chas & Dave at The Corn Exchange, Newbury on Thursday, March 17

I’VE always meant to catch Chas & Dave on their regular visits to The Corn Exchange, but thought I’d missed the opportunity when Dave Peacock announced his retirement in 2009 following the death of his wife - and jumped at the chance when he decided to put his plans on hold for one final tour with Charles “Chas” Hodges.

There’s something very heartwarming about Chas & Dave’s distinctive and original “rockney” sound, mixing rock & roll with musical hall lyrics and a pub singalong style. EastEnders ought to establish them as the Queen Vic’s house band to cancel out some of Albert Square’s never-ending misery (it would make better use of the pub’s piano as well). They are loved by musicians from Led Zeppelin who had them open their legendary Knebworth show in 1979, to The Libertines, who cited them as direct inspiration for their sound. They also received the ultimate “cool” accolade when they played Glastonbury in 2005.

The first part of the show was a rip-roaring journey through Hodges and Peacock’s musical influences and early days as session musicians, demonstrating how strongly early rock & roll and boogie-woogie influenced their musical style. They moved on to their hits in the second half, from 1979’s Gertcha to 1986’s Snooker Loopy, and I doubt anyone who grew up in the 1980s has truly forgotten The Sideboard Song or Ain’t No Pleasing You, even if they’ve tried to (a quick survey among friends suggested that Chas & Dave incite quite contrasting feelings).

Joined on stage by Hodges’ rather comely son Nick on drums, replacing the long-serving Mick Burt, with Hodges on piano and Peacock on bass, the duo’s oh-so-English vocals are a central part to their sound, their voices merging in a way that only performers who have worked together for so many years manage to achieve. It’s all great fun, but also a demonstration of musicianship that goes deeper than the comedic stylings and witticisms of their hit songs.

While the show was an uplifting celebration of the pair’s 36 years together, there was no doom-laden sense of finality about proceedings (and I saw A-ha on their farewell tour in December so I know what I’m looking for). I might be wrong, but I wouldn’t be surprised if this turns out not to be Chas & Dave’s final visit to Newbury after all.  “Nobody else can do that”, commented Peacock after the frenetic ending to Rabbit (“Yup yup rabbit rabbit bunny jabber rabbit...”). This pair of musicians look as if they’re having far too much fun to give up on this touring lark entirely just yet.

• First published in Newbury Weekly News, Thursday, March 24, 2011

It's just not cricket - review of Miles Jupp

Miles Jupp - Fibber In The Heat, at New Greenham Arts, Newbury, on Thursday, March 10

HAVING been rather burnt by an uncomfortable evening spent in the company of Will Hodgson and his disconcerting tales of a childhood being bullied, I tend to shy away from storytelling comedians, so it was probably rather fortuitous that I hadn’t done my advance research and twigged that Miles Jupp’s show was one long tale surrounding the England cricket team’s 2006 tour of India.

Inspired mainly in my attendance by my fondness for Jupp’s character Archie the Inventor in the CBeebies series Balamory, I was aware that the actor also performed stand-up comedy, but I hadn’t expected him to combine the two in such a well-told based-on-a-true story of dreams achieved and thwarted, as Jupp described how, jaded with his acting career and buoyed by England’s success in the 2005 Ashes, he made it his aim to break into the world of cricket journalism.

Blagging his way into the press pack with vague promises of some piecework for BBC Scotland and Swansea’ s Western Mail (who were only interested in anything to do with Welsh cricketer Simon Jones - who was injured before the first match), Jupp soon discovered he was well out of his depth among a group of experienced hacks and legendary players-turned-pundits. and by the end of the month-long tour had concluded that there’s no such thing as a dream job, you should never get too close to your heroes, and the view from the press box isn’t all that special.

The joy in the performance was in Jupp’s turn of phrase as he staggered from one disastrous event to the next; trying to avoid sunburn from the glare bounced directly off the pitch into the press box, and attempting to resemble the photograph on the illicit press pass handed to him when his own promised one didn’t transpire. Even the scatological was so eloquently put as to transform a description of a nasty dose of Delhi belly into a voyage of self-discovery, as Jupp realised he had taken on more than he could chew - and not just from the roadside food stall he had stopped at for an ill-advised snack.

Jupp’s trip to India may have been ultimately doomed in terms of turning him onto a new career path, but among the tales of mishaps, loneliness and uncertainty there was an element of triumph in the audacity of his attempts to follow his dream, and his realisation that as a fan of anything there’s no better place than to be among other fans, revelling in the thrill and vibrancy of a crowd enjoying the escapism of an experience that is a million miles away from their day job, whatever that may be.

• First published in Newbury Weekly News on Thursday, March 17, 2011

Hang on to your ego - review of Neil Innes

Neil Innes at Arlington Arts Centre, Snelsmore, on Friday, March 4

THE MUSICAL force behind Monty Python and The Rutles, Neil Innes can certainly turn out a good tune, but he also has a great love for words, philosophy, and the power of ideas. All of which feature in his show, A People’s Guide To World Domination and his concept of the Ego Warrior; people cocking a snook and blowing a raspberry at those who try to tell them what to think.

It’s food for thought among the joyful silliness of Innes’ career, laid out here in tantalisingly brief nods to his past life as “The Seventh Python” - a performance of a missing song from Monty Python And The Holy Grail called Run Away, a medley of gems from “The Prefab Four” aka The Rutles, and a blast from the past in the form of some wonders from the earliest days of the Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band, along with some great anecdotes about the trad jazz movement that inspired them.

Railing against cyberspace in favour of “face mail in the meat zone” - ie real life interaction (although I was amused afterwards to discover that he’s a rather prolific and popular Twitterer), Innes’ real bug bear is the poor quality of television today, dismissing it all as “eye candy”. “I used to be eye candy,” he sighed. “Now I’m eye pickle.” That may well be, but having played a part in such seminal televisual classics as Monty Python’s Flying Circus and Do Not Adjust Your Set, it’s fair to say that he’s well placed to comment on the medium. 

Innes’ Ego Warrior movement is a semi-serious idea; the rebellion of the individual against mass media, mass politics and mass thought, complete with its own protest songs, badge and swearing-in ceremony. But really it’s just all a fabulous excuse to play some of his lesser known songs from the Rutland Weekend Television series and other sources, and encourage the audience to join in whenever possible - entirely of their own free will, of course!

Luckily the crowd was as knowledgeable and enthusiastic as required, if a little smallish - possibly as a result as of clashing commitments to comedian Milton Jones, who played The Corn Exchange the same night. They joined in enthusiastically (and reasonably tunefully) whenever encouraged, and although I’m sure there wasn’t a person present who wouldn’t have liked to hear The Rutles’ How Sweet To Be An Idiot (the song that launched Oasis’ career), everyone had a quite spiffing time.

• First published in the Newbury Weekly News, Thursday, March 10, 2011

Howlin' Loud - review of Howlin' Lord and Case Hardin

Howlin’ Lord and Case Hardin at Ace Space, Newbury, on Friday, February 18

WITH folk-tinged music making its mark at the Brits last week in the form of gongs for Mumford & Sons and Reading’s Laura Marling, it was perfect timing for Newbury community venue Ace Space to prove that folk can rock, with a Friday night showcase of two bands influenced by the Americana strain of the genre.

Well, I say “rock”, but in fact  Reading-based Case Hardin, featuring Ace Space stalwart Adam Kotz on banjo and mandolin - an instrument featured too rarely in popular music outside of REM’s Loosing My Religion - stripped back their more usual plugged-in sound for an acoustic, percussion-less set. Gathered around a single microphone for a performance reminiscent of the aforementioned Mumford & Sons on the Brits (although, Case Hardin pointed out, they’d been using that technique for years) allowed them to rework some of the more upbeat moments from their 12-year back catalogue into something more intimate yet still lively.

Hairy Bristolians Howlin’ Lord, led by their intriguing self-titled frontman, aka Mark Legassick, were a much louder entity, mixing some really quite lovely tunes - Bright Lights being a particularly highlight - with unexpected high-octane covers such as La Bamba. A sweaty, amusing and entertaining set from the trio proved that country-folk can get people up and dancing as much as thinking and listening.

Recently redecorated by its dedicated committee members and team of volunteers, Ace Space has been transformed into an excellent live venue, the small stage’s proscenium arch and star-spangled backdrop framing each act  rather pleasingly. While the venue’s monthly Unplugged events are mainly quite sedate affairs in terms of audience interaction, Friday’s gig proved that with ample dancing space, when punters want to kick up their heels and have a rocking old time of it along with the bands, Ace Space is more than happy to oblige.

• First published in Newbury Weekly News, Thursday, March 3

Hugelaidbackchoonz - review of Tropic of Comfort by Isomeric

Tropic of Comfort by Isomeric

If you like your tunes so laid back they’re horizontal, with silky smooth vocals and lounge-lizard beats, then this album release by new Newbury-based chill duo Isomeric, aka West End musical director Griff “Hugechoonz” Johnson and Simon “Brother of Norman” Cook should chillax you better than any infinity pool ever could.

Released on Johnson and Cook’s own Kollaidal Music label, Tropic Of Comfort features the beautiful vocals of, among others, former Wicked and Oliver! star - and Brian May collaborator - Kerry Ellis, floating effortlessly over the delicate down-tempo beats provided by Johnson and Cook.

In this crazy world, Isomeric provide a moment of calm. Who knew such beauty could be produced in Newbury. So take a trip, relax, and float downstream... somewhere a lot more exotic than the Kennet & Avon Canal.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Ddigital-music&field-keywords=isomeric&x=0&y=0

Fitting it in - keep fit feature

Esther Fairfax, teacher of the Lotte Berk Technique

YOU ate enough over Christmas to see you through to the Spring, the weight loss adverts are on the telly, and gym membership offers are dropping through your door. New year, new you, is your resolution, but that hasn’t motivated you beyond February in the past, so why should it in 2011?

The answer might be to try something a bit different - be it challenging, fun, fulfilling or a little bit crazy, there are plenty of activities out there which are a world away from pounding the pavements, providing a social side and working wonders for the soul as much as the body.

There’s plenty out there to chose from - and West Berkshire certainly has its fair share of hidden gems. With this little lot to try your hand at, you need never go near a treadmill again...

Buggyfit - New mums often want to get back into shape, but it’s hard to squeeze in a fitness plan when you have a baby. Buggyfit gives you no such excuse, as it’s an outdoor exercise class which fuses your cherub’s pushchair into the workout. 

These classes are designed to allow post natal mums to exercise safely, but having attempted this one myself, I can confirm that the Buggyfit workout is no walk in the park; it’s a combination of powerwalking and toning exercises that burn fat, raise the heartrate and strengthen neglected muscle groups.

“It’s about friendship and a support network as well as the exercise,” says local Buggyfit instructor Elizabeth Masters. “It’s sad when a mum has to stop because she’s gone back to work, but some are able to keep coming as long as they’ve got a buggy. Some of the ladies are really hardcore - they always turn up, whatever the weather.”

The classes utilise the terrain with park benches providing convenient staging posts. Buggyfit classes can be attended as soon as mums have been given the medical all-clear for exercise; however, they really need to be pushing a three-wheeler; a travel system might make the workout a little bit too challenging.

Ceroc - Featuring a dance style fusing jive and salsa, ceroc classes are as much a social scene as a form of exercise. Indeed, Newbury instructor Val Rokov believes that most people start attending for the social element of the evenings rather than viewing the classes as a potential new fitness regime.

“However, it does have massive benefits in terms of weight and fitness,” she says. “I started dancing 13 years ago, and haven’t returned to the gym since.”

Ceroc dancers are certainly put through their paces; pedometers have shown that dancers can take 12,000 in an evening. But Val says that ceroc is easy to learn, and beginners are made to feel very welcome - “no one is ever a wallflower. Three hours just fly by, and everyone ends on such a high.”

Forces Fit - Military-style classes led by current or former members of the Armed Forces may sound like a bit of a scary concept, but instructor Kevin Gormley says that Forces Fit is not just aimed at those already at the peak of physical fitness. “Classes are divided into ability groups, so beginners are very welcome, even those who may not have exercised regularly for a long time. It really is for everyone,” he says.

“It’s enjoyable, supportive, friendly and effective. Going to the gym can be like being on an underground train - no one talks to each other. We describe this as ‘training with a breath of fresh air’.”

Classes are held twice a week all year round in Goldwell Park, Newbury - the one with the gruelling hill. And the Forces Fit team don’t let a little thing like darkness get in the way of their workout, with two evening classes a week being held all year round.

Hatha yoga - “The brilliant thing about yoga,” says Lucy Malkin, “is that there are so many styles. Some are strenuous and give you a really tough workout, while others focus more on meditation. It means that yoga can suit everybody, from athletes to people in their 80s. A decent yoga teacher is one who knows how to modify a style to suit the individual.”

Lucy focuses on Hatha yoga, which covers “all physical styles of yoga”, meaning her classes can be modified to cater for old injuries, address specific physical issues, or enhance the body’s metabolic rate.

“Central to the ethos of yoga is better learning to inhabit the body we’ve been given rather than striving for the body beautiful,” says Lucy. “It’s about feeling more relaxed and comfortable in your skin, and being able to deal with stress.

“It clearly has physical health benefits - it can make people lean, strong and supple - but this is just a happy side affect for a lot of people.  Some people find their inner peace through working out hard, but others find it through being very quite and gentle. Yoga is non-judgemental.”

Kettlebell - Like a cannonball with handles, kettlebells are used by the Russian military to build up muscular strength. They are becoming popular for use at home - although you do need the room to swing the proverbial cat. However, group kettlebell training sessions are also catching on, such as those run by The Workout Team.

“Kettlebells provide a fundamental workout, using the body in the way it was designed,” explains The Workout Team’s Ria Ingleby. “They improve overall strength and endurance, work on core muscles and are good for posture. The kettlebell swing is a fundamental exercise; it really does work the whole body.”

Ria suggests that even those intending to a kettlebell at home should attend a short course in order to learn how to use them safely.

Lotte Berk Technique - West Berkshire’s best kept fitness secret has surely got to be the intimate and friendly classes run by Esther Fairfax, daughter of fitness pioneer Lotte Berk. The lithe and effervescent septuagenerian Esther and her long-term pupils are a wonderful advertisement for the benefits of the technique, which is based on dancers’ warm-up exercises - “without the dancing,” laughs Esther.

“These exercises are very small, very intense and very deep,” she explains. “Everything is based around the ‘tilt’, which my mother brought into the fitness industry, and for which I don’t think she gets enough credit. They create a smooth, firm line, not bulges.”

Many of Esther’s pupils demonstrate that a lifetime of exercise really does pay off, with her oldest student being aged 86 - “although we do have some students under 40”. The secret, she says, is that the technique keeps muscles strong so that joints remain well supported.

The women attending the class I observed at Esther’s carpeted dance studio in Hungerford had been following the method for between 25 and 40 years, with fabulous results. However, Esther says that newcomers are welcome. “Although you will never feel as bad as you do the day after your first class,” she says. “It puts muscles you didn’t know you had into shock.”

Newbury Fencing Club - It may not provide the gruelling cardio-vascular workout of some other activities, but fencing gives you the opportunity to test out your mastery of tactics and timing. “Fencing has become a lot more accessible as a spectator sport,”  says Imad Rahman of Newbury Fencing Club. “It’s certainly something you can take up as an adult - we run beginners’ courses three times a year to introduce people to the basics.”

But what about the risk of injury? Those points look sharp... “The weapons are designed to break very easily,” says Imad. “The most common injuries in fencing are actually muscle pulls, when people haven’t warmed up properly.”

Pole fitness - Put images of high heels and skimpy costumes out of your head; pole fitness has more in common with gymnastics, with the pole being used as a vertical bar.

“People have preconceived ideas, but it’s about fitness, not dancing,” says teacher Kate Tolhurst. “Gymnasts and dancers tend to pick it up really quickly, although you don’t need the strength to begin with to get up to a similar standard. 

“Pole fitness makes you really aware of the body’s posture; it’s really good for you physiologically, as well as providing a great cardio workout. It’s also very empowering. Your confidence grows as you learn the moves and begin to perform routines. It’s also really sociable. There’s a massive ‘pole’ community out there.”

Zumba - One of the liveliest workouts around, zumba is a fitness programme based on international music and dance styles that aims to turn every class into a party. “The moves are quite wiggly,” says Newbury instructor Emma Stanley, who runs classes at Greenacre Leisure Club and Nu Yuu. “It’s great if you’re trying to whittle down your waist.

“There are a lot of ‘secret squats’ hidden behind the dance moves as well, which are great for your legs and thighs. I’ve seen the difference it’s made to my own body - it’s the one class I’ve done which really helps you lose the weight.”

Moves can be modified to factor in knee or hip problems, and there’s no right or wrong way of doing it: “Just follow the instructor, and if you go wrong it doesn’t matter,” says Emma. “Most people love it, because it doesn’t feel like a fitness class. It really does have a party atmosphere.”

Contact info:

Buggyfit - www.buggyfit.co.uk, phone 07920 826966

Ceroc - www.cerocnewbury.co.uk, phone 07958 587256

Forces Fit- www.forcesfit.co.uk. phone 07711 856393

Hatha yoga (Stable Yoga) -  http://www.stableyoga.co.uk, phone 01635 250832

Kettlebell (The Workout Team) - www.theworkoutteam.co.uk, phone 07775 862076 

Lotte Berk Technique - www.lotte-berk.com, phone 01488 683 609

Newbury Fencing Club - www.newburyfencingclub.com, phone 01235 559481

Pole Fitness (Kate Tolhurst) - http://www.polefitnessassociation.com/KateTolhurst.html, phone 07748 628 882

Zumba (Emma Stanley) - http://78833.zumba.com/, phone 07905 369 351

• First published in Out & About (Newbury Weekly News), February 2010